Hello, is it me your looking for?

I haven't wrote on here for awhile, it's because I have been uber busy well, not uber but just busy.
Where do I begin really..
This is just like my update to me on here.
Apart from losing my license that was a down nothing much well there has been much i just don't know how to look on my whole situation on things...
It's been a long time when I didn't have any real worries..
I didn't worry about money.
About friends.
worrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry.
is a big thing with me I worry.
I worry alot i worry more than i should think i used to get told all the time that didn't express myself enough and then i did and people still say i just don't bite the bullet.
I felt have done more recently like said things I would have worried about but I'm not going to worry about this!
I need to be more organised with myself especially with money.
I was watching something today and mainly because of last night, i saw lots of people from college and they all asked me what you doing now and i replied i don't really know.
I want to be teacher, I want to go to uni but i can see alot of the bad things about it...
I want to see the world as well I just haven't had enough experiences in life to worry about stupid situations that are going on now.
I'd rather if I had the money pick up my bags and travel meet new people see new places although i would miss what i'm leaving behind mostly meaning family and friends but freakin' amazing would it be just to be one day in Venice and the next in Thailand well not as easy as that but you know what I mean..


I want to get into music more not like listening but playing maybe even singing if I don't stop singing stupidly all the time and maybe get some answers to my own mind ah the answers to my mind. I'm good at forgetting about things I have realised this, I'm good at just moving on.
I'm also good at getting the answers I want.
I'm good to my friends at least i think i am haha.
I have no will power when comes to things like smoking or drinking well a little more with drinking and I have a problem of not shutting up.
But what i'm good at is people.
I think i'm quite good with people i hate treading on peoples toes and i hate upsetting people and i hope other people agree with me on this i think i'm too nice.
Sometimes it is good to be a little mean sometimes to avoid getting walked all over but only be mean for the right reasons.

hm.
I think my dreams are seriously fucked up right now as well it's like my head is overloading with information and i need to release it and i don't really know how =/.
As for my dream, the first seriously weird and depressing dream i had was saturday nights, i was an old woman and i had to give an interview about my life there was a child sat beside me and i'm guessing that's my younger self she spoke for me but the old lady opened her mouth but said no words. It freaked me out i then watched myself die which was quite upsetting because there was no-one around, thing is i know exactly what this means i think, and i do believe that dreams are connected with the mind obviously. But it was one of those dreams where you just felt like you had to wake up to make sure it wasn't real.

Last nights dream was really bad, i wasn't in the dream it was all people i didn't know. I was looking in on a highschool a new girl was starting and she was beaming, smiling introducing herself when two other girls with black lights around them and i watched it for what felt like days as these two girls manipulated this poor naive girl she didn't know what she was doing and they manipulated her so much that she resulted hurting the people around her like murder so watching a 13 year old girl murder her mother isn't the highlight of my dreams that has by far been the most disturbing because it was quite detailed. It just blags my head even more than it already it is.

well well well.
Paramore is Manchester they have added another date. I hope I get a ticket in time or i will have to go to ebay.